Get To Know Her: Nikki S. Payne

by - Monday, September 10, 2018


After surviving the loss of her husband and two children in a tragic murder-suicide, Nikki S. Payne has since embarked on a mission to change lives through a message of ‘creating wellness from the inside out.’  During a climate in which many are suffering in silence with their mental health, Nikki is a passionate advocate for suicide prevention and clearing up the misconception that PTSD only affects Veterans.  In fact, according to numerous statistics, women are twice as likely to experience PTSD which can be triggered by any traumatic event, accident or assault.

"5 symptoms of PTSD include withdrawal from certain people, situations and events, being constantly on edge, having recurring nightmares, feeling easily frightened and/or engaging in substance abuse," says Nikki. "There are 5 coping mechanisms that I would suggest to any woman experiencing PTSD: Stop watching the news and have at least one person in your life that you can reach out too or a professional.  Set boundaries for yourself and don't let other people influence you to change them.  Exercise on a regular basis and be sure to distance yourself from negative or toxic people" she adds.

Affectionately known by many as the 'Comeback Queen', Nikki is eager to empower women around the world to take charge of their "comeback" as well.

Nikki was gracious to interview with us as we hope you get to know her and draw inspiration from her testimony.

Ms. Be More: Where do you draw your strength and courage from?

Nikki: I draw my strength from people that I meet in person and through social media that share with me how much my story inspires them to appreciate life and not take the people in it for granted.  It's not always the people I meet at conferences, but the every day person that I may meet in the line at the grocery store.

Ms. Be More: What advice do you have for those who have gone or maybe currently going through a traumatic experience?

Nikki: The top 3 things I would advise people that have gone through traumatic events would be:  1. have a least one person in your life that you can reach out to or a professional.  2. Set boundaries for yourself and not let anyone influence you to change them.  3. Stop watching the news or any shows that feature traumatic events.

Ms Be More: What was the turning point for you in choosing your mental and emotional health over that of prescription drugs and alcohol abuse?

Nikki: My turning point was January 8, 2011 when I arrived at my moms home and found her dead.  My mom grieved to death over the lost of my children. It was at that point that I knew I had to get my life together and change my ways or my brothers and sisters would one day find me dead too.

Ms. Be More: In what ways have your life experiences shaped you into the woman you are today?

Nikki: My life experiences have taught me to never complain about anything in life and to be grateful because there is always someone in a worse situation that could be praying for the same things I was complaining about.

Ms. Be More: What would you like for your impact or legacy to be?

Nikki: I would like my impact to be that life has a reset button, even after tragedies and disappointments. For some it takes years, some it only takes months and some only seconds, but healing and resetting is possible. 

Ms. Be More: What's next for you along your life's journey?

Nikki: Next, I plan to form a non- profit or foundation in honor of my children, write a book, and expand my body sculpting business.

Ms. Be More: Where can we find you? (website, social media handles, etc)

Nikki: I can be found at www.nikkispayne.com and on Instagram @nikkis_ Payne

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